Adage is Love makes us stronger. Being in love, that is. What about all the not quite there pining, fixation, the unrequited feels? They sure can debilitate. Being in love, once you get a taste…how do you let go when you do not even want to?! How to be alone without being lonely!? How do you chase back what you want most… desire is so overwhelming, that love, that person is something you can not see life without this very moment freshly snatched from it, it weakens your resolve, your judgment…yet it’s so understandable. You only live once, go fight for it LL, Tiffany and JiaYi cheered on. And LL did.
This is the episode we can’t escape YiKang observes LeiLei as a woman…keenly. Their development is nothing but very patiently peeling an onion layer by perfect layer. After easing into a friendship, sharing commiserating moments as 2 human beings in similar boats, but not a hint more. At the end of 4 is when I see the switch…is slowly turned on a slow burn at YiKang’s end. I love this ridiculously: the getting to know each other, a minute observation by a clear observation, taking the time to appreciate each other one kind deed at a time as human beings before the business of infatuation meddling in, before the pheromones take over our brains. For flailing to happen in an uncontrollable grandeur of sweeping off feet is…romantic and dramatic and what crack is made of, but it takes a deft firm confidence this slow simmer takes the time to make the clearest purest consomme of what an adult romance could have its full flavors developed.
Let me start the spazzing with the mother lode: they keep calling each other, by their full name, and it is the most squeeworthy thing. It started as them acknowledging each other, constantly, most of the time it is tainted with frustration at the beginning of the episode, no denying a closeness of their rapport: not exactly the best of friends yet from LeiLei’s vantage point, but a ripple in her new ‘calm’, gone is that big fuss over leading parallel lives as nobody to the other party. YK has already taken LL in as a friend he cares quite the good-nature sweetest busybody, but without his meddling LL would not break her cocoon of not inviting anyone in, friend or foe.
Oh YK, you think you have the emotions all neatly sorted out and tackled, huh? That is never how these things work. Especially not when you are intruding into a certain lady’s life genuinely as a friend and she…is starting to make a habit of it, appreciating your kindness.
LeiLei is enjoying her cuppa (I assume YK made it), reminiscing every moment YK has given her a friendly poke.
This chapter is titled: Heed! Comrade?! Day 1
I did not notice till rewatching the mention of days since they met last episode, or this episode marking the first day they are truly friends. I would say how attentive and observant YK is towards LL is squarely in the murky zone of just about to…fall. I love how we start the episode with YK being pragmatic, accepting the hand he is dealt, trusting being alone in solitude gives rise to a calmness he is indulging for a change of pace for his feelings. ‘Pragmatism’ for LeiLei is a different beast with her lovely meddling friends, throwing a suitor at her just to prove LL is so not over WT, under the calm front LL is putting on. Tiffany nudges LL again on The strategy of joining forces with YK breaking up WT and Helen so they both can have fresh chances with what they desire the most. It may not be the most moral thing to do, but as long as there is no ring on the finger, it’s fair game. Life is too short to not fight the darnest battles for happiness. LL has another ominous push with a bad dream not helping her fear of growing old alone. The sweet ladies promise LL they will take that family portrait with her. I believe them. And D’AWWWWWWWWWWWW.
Argh. On what planet is this a test if a friend is feverish. Of course if wind is Tony Yang is feverish and I happen to be stalking him, I would do that with lips involved and TY is not my ‘friend’ and he does not know me other than creepy stalker.
Mr. Dumbass of mixed signal: You are truly a very important person in my life.
And… ‘You are the first (girl)friend in my new ride’
LL allows herself to go with his vague words for a ride, immediately she caught Helen’s scent/perfume. She is no longer the one most important person/girlfriend to this ready to settle down ‘normal’ dude.
Again, this is why I love this drama so much, while this arc is tired plot device, and not too honorable of our heroine to butt herself into her ex’s current relationship, dragging her new friend/OTP along through the mud, this is not thrown at us without progression. We are familiar with LL’s recurring fear of forever alone, instigated by Tiffany and Jiayi constant bff coersion, WT’s suddenly flopping into her life putting ideas with their every encounter, especially damning is he is claiming he is a changed man. If a less desirable WT is still owning LL’s heart (I’ll just go with it, it’s convincingly acted out by Sonia, but that does not mean I have to understand…ie same stance as Tiffany and JiaYi), his presence is rendering a vulnerable LL out of options but to pine for him some more. And there after a whole day of girlfriend companionship therapy of encouraging her to heed, she is buzzed up, inhibition and clarity of thought is not at her finest and there props a WT all sweet and concerned about her being, genuinely, as a friend, just out of her reach…forever. And the bricks are neatly laid piece by piece for the next scene to happen.
This is a tiny passing scene, but there does not go an entrance of LL into her home without YK giving her a little pat of ‘Welcome home’ hello, and very often YK will give LL an intense look, a checking up on how she is doing, if I may and it left me so awestruck especially keeping in mind this is a guy being genuinely nice and caring 24/7 not because of romantic notions, and opposite of any encouragement from the lady.
YK: You are back.
LL has mistaken YK’s spread of work after hearing his recording at Tiffany’s spa as him working on a porno. This cracks YK up and his prankster mode is on asking if LL is interested in filling in as the leading lady.
Joking aside, he fills LL in on his new collab with Tiffany. I am not one to miss a Tony Yang nikkid cap uttering comfy~ with this face:
LL nudges in her agenda, proposing YK a position at her company. YK is understandably confused why LL would still care to drag him in when she is leaving.
LL: I want to be a lioness.
LL: All along I can only accept my fate and be an antelope.
Weak, vulnerable in need of companions to not be eaten alive.
LL: You are my enemy.
And we along with YK is going Whut!?!?!??!
LL goes on making less sense hammering in her point: If YK was not a failure at winning Helen’s affection, she could have had her happily ever after with WT.
So, your current misfortune is my problem.
Hmmm do not want to spoil you, but YK, that is how love goes: her pain is your pain, you know!?
Did I miss hearing an entire chapter or something just now?
Yup, she is your problem very soon, if not now.
Do I need to dedicate my soul to you?
More like you would dedicate your heart to this woman. 🙂
Helen has new ideas for their project, now they need a designer asap. Professionally, LL acknowledges Helen’s moves as very innovative, it also kills 2 birds with one stone giving her another chance to bugger YK to be her antelope companion .
This will probably be my new home from now on…
LL offers to buy YK lunch, he invites her into his possible new shabby home. He also has a game to play.
YK fakely sings praises of the poopy yellow walls, he then pulls a puppy cute face while ‘selling’ the place having no windows in the bathroom and rent is exorbitant.
You have not really rent the place, right?
Do I smell a sniff of genuine concern…and care!?
If you come, maybe I won’t leave.
LL is not giving up on her heavy-handed persuasion. She is upping the ante, throwing in housing and free rent. YK knows it is the dealing of his soul to satan again when she promises to clear up the storage room even when niece and her Mr is back from honeymoon. LL insists it is the deal of antelope in need of comrades.
I can let him know I have never let go of my feelings for him.
YK: For that, we could break them up.
Or we can put it as pursuing our happiness.
If you never try, you will never succeed,
LL throws in the adage as if it would make her stance less audacious.
You are utterly rotten.
YK has enough. LL can fight by all means for her own happily ever after with her WT, everything coming out of YK and every face, cringe, smirk he is making is more legit. He has learned his lesson well his opinion can be intrusive and he is trying to hold his tongue after the sat down last night. Here LL is at it again when he is expecting a nice lunch and a bit of pandering on his part to soften her letting him be her tenant longer. He is frustrated by all the accusations LL is throwing his way of being a coward, not deserving Helen just because he is not going along with her flow. But to me he is most disappointed with LL, how low she would go in her pursuit of happiness, he obviously has a much higher respect for her than her action is speaking. He has tried not to judge her too harshly on the issue, but he snaps and it pisses LL off more because of her pride. Deep down she knows these are the frankest, truest words even her BFFa deem not for them to say and it is not without struggling with her own moral compass she is taking this leap. But as a bystander, I can squee a little at how flustered YK is when LL is hurling insults at him stomping off. Even though he is the one asking her to leave, he does not mean it.
Sorry my bffs, I may need new bffs in the form of Tiffany and JiaYi. It is hard to balance friendship with other obligations in life and they keep going at it relentless. Just the other day it was a matchmaking lunch with gooey moments straight down to drinking through the night to LL’s heart’s desire. And here Tiffany has arranged Latin dancing, the intimate moves between lovers, with hot instructors. Healthy exercise and HAWT men and…Tiffany can hook up a catch in one scoop.
While they are freshening up, JiaYi invites LL to be the 3rd wheel at her movie date with hubs later on, Tiffany gets a fast date with Mr instructor but we know she won’t blink to call it off to keep LL company. They suggest a booty call to WT preferably to a dark deserted nook. This coming from JiaYi’s mouth! lol All along I thought she is the square pants.
She has made her girlfriend stamp with her perfume….My position is..the backseat.
And the BFFs are devastated just seeing their LL pensive and terribly lonely without the one person she can’t have. LL puts on a brave smiley face telling them she is fine alone. She wants nothing more than a hot bath and a good rest.
‘Anyways, you have Huang YiKang to keep you company at home.‘ says JaiYi! AGAIN! I feel like we are soulmates of 10 lifetimes.
I love this following scene: LL prescribing herself some self-healing chicken soup for the soul
Happiness is my own pursuit.
I no longer believe in fairytales.
I do not need anyone bestowing me glass slippers. (I am ok all by myself)
But Tiffany and JiaYi make my eyes misty being too precious, they turn back fetching LL for a lady’s night. LL is moved to the brink of tears, she is ok by herself, but life is better with company. (What a lovely job Sonia, but who is not spotting her exact face?! :~~D)
YK sees LL’s necklace from WT in the trash and as the best maid/manny service EVER, he leaves LL a note in case she has dropped it by mistake. LL is still in a glum mood from their clash over lunch not even giving him a glance when he has his eyes all on her as soon as she enters, he has trash in hand (gahhhh I have hots for men who will do chores more diligently than I can ever without a fuss) and offers to throw the necklace for her.
YiKang repeats exact words of her charged quip asking her to take care of her business from now on since he is leaving in a few daysand gets his head bitten off.
Both of their feelings are hurt and they continue venting on each other with their bickering… This is not the first time this turns into what exactly is defined as lover’s quarrel.
And YK is the gentleman breaking up the conflict with a lets agree to disagree and good night. He never skips a good morning or a good night to LL even in the heat of a squabble. Attaboy!
LL contemplates if she is truly a horrible woman, his words haunts her. This is no treatment of a nobody who is going to disappear after a few days in her life, right?!
LL tells Helen she fails to recruit the help they are in dire need.
LL frankly admits she thought so to, but she is apparently a rotten person in his mind. lol OTP is being quite cute shaken from all the mindless insults they are hurling at each other.
LL has a PlanB, she is going to compel WT to be the speaker of their event, emphasizing how important this is for Helen to prove her worth to the department on her first outing yet she is so considerate of his feelings inasmuch she can not bear to mention, let alone force him to oblige… but LL would.
Cunningly played, LL.
LL is off to a foot massage with her pampering conjoined twinnie JiaYi. Sigh, the two of them has my quota of pampering for MONTHS done in weeks. *ENVIOUS* JiaYi is not reading into why LL would encourage the selfless sacrifice on WT’s part in the name of love.
BFF beats GF!
LL went where the gf dares not venture.
OTOH, our guileless princess Helen is off to accomplish what LL fails to deliver: grabbing a YK…for now.
YK, the hopelessly romantic artist has given Helen an omamori wishing her best luck in romance. She has sweetly kept in pristine condition…because she met WT shortly after his blessing. OUCH!!! YK made one for himself, holding the secret adoration for her, and holding up that forced smile perfectly, breaking my heart he yearns for her answer to his question he has kept in his heart:
Helen is awesome coming up with the marvelous idea of designing an omamori into a luggage tag as a thoughtful gift, tying into the beauty product they are promoting: A hope in a jar for the life’s journey, the pursuit of happiness. A girl can always use a good luck charm in love. She is commissioning YK to redesign his gift to her as a savvy business move. Her idea so sound YK is out of excuse to refuse. This shakes his resolve of mind made up to stay far far away from her in order to trap his feelings in an eerie emotional calmness that is ‘nice’, he thought. And now he realizes he was just numbing himself, he is nervous knowing he can not safely contain himself when he has to face Helen (and WT) constantly. And who is he to be all noble judging, lecturing LL when he is crumbling over just a job offer?!
Remember that happy dance LL did over foot massage gloating her win over the gf and how it should make Helen jealous? Oh what a coincidence in the juxtaposition Helen pulled on LL unintentionally.
If LL has no care for YK, as a comrade, a buddy, whatever the label is atm, he is a constant she appreciates, she even assumes they are friends! If she does not place his opinion on her in some form of significance, why is she fuming, demanding an apology of his harsh words when her ultimate goal is attained?! Instead of focusing on pining after WT and be vexed by him and/or Helen, LL is taking a strange detour hollering at YK, and for what? For YK not apologizing his words hurt her feelings. Quite a big tantrum (which I enjoy hahaha). YK will be there stewing in her same misery and there is the chance he’ll crack and give in what his heart desires, everyone is weak under the influence of love. She knows all too well, has ample experience. YK is not as aware. He is holding his head up, he insists he sets out to help Helen out, for her good, nothing more, unlike LL. LL is calling him out, he swore he could and would keep a distance from Helen now that she has found her happiness but here he is eating his words. Would Helen insist on his help if she knew his feelings? Is this simply a friendly gesture when he is not being honest with himself ?!
But YK has a point, what happens from this point on, he is not naive to the possibilities, but he did not set out to selfservingly tear a pair of lovers apart. He uses Wizard of Oz as an analogy of how they may be on the same yellow brick road but their motive and intention can not be more different.
You want HWT, I want the happiness of Helen.
But Helen does not look the vision of bliss. WT finally fess up LL is his ex, a fact Helen can sense since day1. H is such a sweetheart (WT does not deserve), she does not make a fuss about it but is not afraid to let her thoughts be known.
It is not easy to cheer on LL this episode, while you have to understand and be supportive of your bestie hitting a trainwreck headon because that is what she wants to do most in life, there is no way you can cheer on wholeheartedly. But there are moments like this one where she is being reasonable and professional, approving YK’s presentation despite not in her sharpest mind, prioritizing her responsibilities above her emotions, aware her heart is not wanting the right thing but what will make it sing. Or so she thought.
We have a sequence of them unaware of the gazes the other party is focusing, ALL THE TIME, impressed with how truly professional and talented and competent the other is, even with ulterior motives (though I am behind YK his intention is pure, just not to LL)
This scene got my loudest squees. Imo this is Day1 YK has feelings for LL, dazzled by her putting her all at work. The experience of working beside Helen is giving him a pat on the upside of his head, down from his high horse, he truly feels how hard it must’ve been for LL and she has been handling Helen with genuine respect as a colleague. Seeing how passionate and dedicated she is with her job, guilt hits him for judging her, butting in with his over simplistic pragmatism. All through this exchange Tony’s YK has never break focus on LL with a new layer of tenderness.
(‘That is the true motive of you staying, right? I can admire that,’ YK must be thinking)
LL feeds him his medicine of the Wizard of Oz analogy. She acknowledges his concern for her well being, but as he said, Dorothy, lion and Tinman are not of the same breed. With that, my squeemeter got off the charts!
I will interpret that precious delicious smile on YK is him doing a little dance inside because LL puts his words to heart…at least she mocks him. A snide response is better than her non-treatment cold shoulder last few days.
Sorry, I should not criticize you. Everyone has their own approach with love.
He then pouts on so adorably for LL’s forgiveness throwing in her nicks of Little Auntie, LeiLeiSis, pleading her to take him back as a friend. Did I say he is adorable?!
Of course LL succumbs. Oops she takes a bad fall.
WT and Helen visit LL at the hospital. YK can’t help giving Helen a loaded stare as she is pouring her genuine concern over LL. Yes, we know Helen is perfect YK, and she can not be yours. Instead she picks a sleazy looking derp who is putting a smile on LL you can not do, just with his silly presence. You are allowed to sulk. But he just takes a woeful split second, he is back to all concern about LL, talking sense to her taking a few days off in her condition.
YK to the rescue bringing her supper/nightcap. LL is visibly impressed.
This is how intense and swoony YK looks at LL, not breaking the stare for a moment. How did LL manage to eat instead of droolzing?
*OS decides to delete 20 mookie’s pervie thoughts out loud here*
(and yummy and delicious and hot…ok I added a few of my adjectives here, LL uses one)
YK nudges LL some more to forgive him, whining he has already apologize. But LL tells him she has not accepted his apology, hasn’t she?!
Even though it is by sheer accident we are under the same roof,
I have to thank you.
Is this your farewell speech?
His ‘farewell’ speech is more than amazing:
YK stresses again he has no place to criticize LL, she is the one who truly knows her feelings and how important WT is to her.
*I love the fact LL is so immersed in her work this episode she has no time (nor care) to pine over WT. Whew*
LL smiles, but she doubts how true he can know her in 2 weeks.
YK is so sure he has her down:
She looks tough and fearless, but not. She has a feisty tongue but her heart is as soft as silken tofu. There is no way around LL headbutting her full on, but she succumbs to a persuasive word. LL’s face is too telling of how spot on he is.
LL feeds in his spot on assumption she is opposite to the front she puts on, faking a wince he reads her wrong…but she quickly asks for Mr psychic’s love advice what she should do with herself if she is as he said.
With her patience and perseverance apparent from the years she has been pining incessantly for WT, he is sure she will find the one, soon. No truer words. *And she has found him already. :D*
With this, another honest heart-to-heart (they seems to have a few good ones every episode huh?! No wonder) The funky mood between them is completely lifted. LL even jokes she is not worried for him finding a job after this project because he can be a love-mancer.
YK thanks LL wholeheartedly as his landlord, to which LL is charitable in complimenting him as an alright (we all know she means PERFECT!) tenant. That is 2 huge compliments (after saying he’s considerate) in one sitting YK!
And LL takes serious notes on how sweet this guy really is. I sigh a big relief out of all my awwing and squeeing it takes a great clear head to give credit where it deserves, in this case, giving YK this appreciative look for being the sweetheart he is in the middle of infatuating about another person.
Her voiceover continues on the thought, this peace of mind, this serenity, this tranquility, this contention…this happiness (embodied by this piece of hotness HYK) is unaware to her at the time.