Moonlight Drawn By Clouds 14

This hits me, again, in a very sweet spot as I am crying my own foggy, misty river how love is painted by missing the one, so completely, so terribly, so tenderly, so beautifully, in quiet, plain rhymes.

What kind of very Horrible person wander a tiny moment I am perhaps robbed of a KDY nikkid (legit for the lets help RO coalition) pretending  just waking up smexy moment as Prince tromped in his quarters asking about RO.  I also appreciate the simple finality of a single (cheesy) token of love bracelet is effective a wordless fare thee well.

KDY did make it up with spectacular emoting BY is about to explode from all the overflowing secrets he could no longer tiptoe around, staying as loyal to everyone as only a GatBY could, quivering his most beautiful eye.

My adoration of drama’s cohesiveness is, Prince’s moxie, mind is sharply spinning untangling all the conundrum, still performing his duties as regent competently, keenly noting Minister Jo’s just defiance of Kims, appointing Mr J as his competent private investigator.

Word of an alleged WhiteCloudClan young thief around RO’s age in the middle of digging into KimClown’s money trail with MrJ and Prince swiftly rushes to the prison, there must be a hope if it was her, he could stop loving her, perhaps, but he is more relieved she is not RO in prison facing death… then yearning she was RO, as long as he could see her again.  So competent, even at compartmentalization his emotions, all the while when he is the exact visual, as HY laments, of his entire world lost.

Seeing you so haggard…would’ve broken the heart of the one you love. 

After she’s gone, missing her so brokenly, he goes to his most trusted BY despite WhiteCloud suspicion.  My take is Prince’s mind was made-up BY has connections with WhiteCloud, thus must’ve known of RO’s identity as RebelHong’s daughter, on top of capable Kim hyung would be RO’s first choice aiding an escape …he is still on the lookout what is the capacity of BY’s involvement while contemplatively trust BY will never harm him nor RO mo matter.   In deliberate crafted words he begs YS, on the keenest observation of his every word, every nuance for anything YS knows about her, parsing, because unlike himself, YS could pragmatically control the urge to ask about RO… from YS’ apology he could not and would not, Prince actually gets an answer, so desperate a reprieve is at least YS knows, thus …she is alive.

How are you holding up? 

-You must know, not asking about her.  And I must ask, even if…

I am sorry.

 

It is one element if love is lost, his faith could find a way, he could still believe, but RO being the daughter of RebelHong destroys his faith of them fated to be.  They are fated never to be, even though never as sure RO is loving him as he is loving her, and spiraling in his exact pain, knowing the other is hurting too.  Call me a masochist, these fresh throes of wretched pain missing and longing is love so intense, it must be addictive to poke the not yet existing scab, in denial of the heartbreak being permanently scar-forming.

RO must have pored into the flower word of the Egret orchid/鷺草 Mom is still embroidering for Dad:  My love and thoughts for you will follow you into your dreams.  As soon as RO asks about Dad, Mom holds her hand in support, she lets RO right on she knows how RO feels, it hurts holding onto the hope the lover she is missing, will still feel her love for him every moment, waking or in dreams.  She wishes she has poured all her love for him, as he was sleeping so contently, her kiss was his last conscious moment before sweetest dreams.   She still can hold up she is fine for Mom with that thought.  As long as her love for him can transform into blessings for him… as long as he is safe and sound.

 

It was one of any other nights, they both reminisced, the moon is lucid in the palace…with him .   Whenever she is talking, whatever she is saying, he gazes at her lovingly, so attuned to learning anything about her.  Tenderly he ogles, immediately collecting how harsh her childhood was with nowhere to settle, projecting a constant in the moon, keeping tab of drifting towns each with its unique shape during phases, he allows a second away from doting attention, poking fun at her just to ease in grabbing her hand, pouring his heart how sheltered and confined his childhood was, trying best to ease her inferiority lest it projects how different their worlds were/are.  RO immediately gets his drift like soulmates they are, her world was better, she smirks, free in the vast.

It does not matter how different we are, where we are, as long as our feelings are the same, like the moon, it is always there.  Lovely heartfelt words he said, perhaps clumsier than her mastery in flowery prose, RO taking a slight moment to grin at the cute before beaming him her gorgeous smile of how sweetly she is loved by him, she knows.

Instead of moongazing, they spent the time much better, giggling into lovely starry eyes.

 

The sweet child, so much on his plate on top of barely grasping the devastating heartbreak, still never loses any of his sharp intuition and compassion,  his soothing thoughtful words eases the fragile mind of his Dad with the new panic arising with the mentions of RebelHong of late.  It is lovely we have a little scene of King trying to love his firstborn as he promised, at the birth of his newborn son.

But it is also so understandably human and a very young Regent at that, next when Kimclown rouses Prince with what he gathered on RO while gossiping, he lashes rashly his dirty money trail.   I trust in a normal state of mind Prince would’ve shrewdly present the accusation after more thorough investigation in the court, put him on the spot, instead of leaking out his next move so Kims could prep for a cracking.  All the intricate working of one plot point leading to the other, no matter how minor or predictable, giving flawless plausibility of every move, every thought of every character.

The Moon is, represents, My Heart, My Love.   It was a bright clear night, the moon lit them as they only have eyes for each other.  It was many nights drawn by moody clouds, misty eyes, foggy paths blocking a clear view to the moon but it is there, even when moonlight is escaping their sight.  SY shows her the ‘thousand miles lens’, the moon too afar will appear next to her, overwhelms her sight entirely, of his love.  He says another of his very cute but cheesy confessions she used to cutely smirk at a little while smiling with such joy.   As long as they have faith in their love, it is like the moon, always there in the sky whoever wherever whenever, a sliver of new,  full circle fate of them bound to meet, he says, whether you see all of it or not.   The moon is larger than she has ever seen, she can never see him again, how he is taking up more than her heart’s fill, now filling her eyes with nothing but tears.  Tears she is too vulnerable to share with anyone, let alone a very nice gentleman eager to offer a shoulder for her to lean on.

It was my first ever concert I saved up, a treat for my Mother.  It was LeslieCheung comeback concert.  He covered this best known EVER sinopop The Moon Represents My Heart by TeresaTeng , dedicating it to his Mom and his ‘bestfriend’ Mr Tong, graciously coming out of the closet, confessing his love for his same-sex partner.  It was my Mother’s only karaoke song still.  The year was 1997, Hong Kong handover from British rule to PRC.  HK, my life was never the same again.  Song is that devastatingly memorable to me, and drama is evoking that memory.  I am in a stupor.

I would bring the girl, the proof she is the mastermind of the Rebels responsible for your assassination to you, even if I have to cut off all her limbs, Your Highness.

What started with coping he could hang on just knowing she is safe, is now shattered with Kim’s threat to bodily harm her.  It has been too long I come across a genuinely understandably horrible foul masterful adversary.  I am a horrible person, slowclapping that line of most brilliant kill right at the tenderest most painful part of his heart.  *LangYaBang, yup you suck in that department alone.*  The vile words he contorts, flows seamlessly with their framing all along and the additional intelligence he just acquired from a WhiteCloud mole (JinYoung the cutiepie slipped us all who the mole is in an insta <_<).  It makes perfect sense he would have a mole there, also making more sense he would use this valuable piece of information to bait for even MORE precious intel: Prince’s ultimate weakness for the KILL.

 

It causes me physical pain seeing him so tortured.   That magical phantomous shifty shadows of his room overcast by the ostentatious frames, cinematography genius, I love you.  Meticulous as he is, he could not shake RO’s suspicion to the point he imagines the traumatizing visual of almost having her killed, and he himself so close to losing his life was all an act of RO as the culprit…aware it is plausible, he could only say it out loud to shut his mind, willing it to be impossible.

His room may be harrowed empty, but he has to close his eyes, so tormented, haunted by the bloody scene he was almost killed, thinking nothing but he would have lost her in the hands of the rebels.  He has to lose his love…and now the escalation of his faith in truth and loyalty.

Behind the veil, her fog of romance, HY boldly professes her love for Prince, her faith in ceaseless true love will enable her support to sacrifice for love, for Him.  With a conniving Kimclan Queen and a newborn Prince benefiting her lineage only, music to King’s ears.  The wedding is naturally full speed ahead…leaving behind the carnage of two walking deads lovebirds.

As much as Prince has entertained the idea to go along with the wedding deal with all things forcing him forward: Minister Jo repeatedly taking a rational, supporting stance, RO’s danger with Kim’s threat thus he must earn political power to override him as swiftly as eminently as possible and none as convenient as the marriage now.  When the reality hits, all respectable coping, deems too hopeless a fight against the fresh hell.  To think the downward spiral of a broken heart that keeps breaking some more, his last resort of a solution to latest hit is hiding in his sanctuary, their secret garden, hoping and praying for RO to miraculously appear, rescuing him out of his worst nightmare he had lost all wits to handle no more…any intrusion, the noble lady he must marry instead of RO, is blasphemy.   Our poor HY gets the harsh message from the only person she is going to love for the rest of her life.

Got to applaud wise Mom’s slimmest hope of ending daughter’s lovelorn misery easing in news of the upcoming royal wedding, occupying her with needlework or anything.  RO has such an honorable respect for decorum, she would not allow herself to cry in front of her Mom, worrying her some more.   The river it is, let it flows along with her tears.   Even if we know RO is not leading YS on,  it is a given the poor guy will get hopes if RO keeps courteously going along.  This is the soundest moment for RO to be cruel to him in order to not be cruel to herself, tending to her own sanity.   She has only agreed to seeing YS whenever he shows up,  not because of his person, but as a vessel for information…because she wants to hear about Prince, anything will do, whether he is eating, sleeping, healthy.  Now she knows he is moving on with the wedding, she has no room to bear the guilt stringing YS along her pathetic love for another guy.   Even when YS states he realizes his boundary full well now, will no longer burden her with his own delusional thoughts, asking her to cry in front of him without any hesitation…just as he is in her heart, non-existent.  Still, she could not allow herself to bare her emotions completely to another man, covering her face.

I am obsessed with these authentic details of a true gentleman, not even allowing his fingers to grace her be it out of a mindless exchange, or desperate most necessary friendly comforting.

Again the mundane bracelet is so thoroughly used to speak silent saddest poetry.  It is one thing she left hers as a succinct finality, another for he himself to betray his faith.  So deplorable, unforgivable he must be feeling facing this physical representation of his love for her, he does not even deserve to cry openly at it…yet he could not stop looking through his fingers, the fog of his tears of his love which used to belong to her, longing for her.

A beauty of this show is the predictable plausibility.  To kill two lovebirds in one stone, playing with their longing is exactly what the hawkish mind of KimHan would not miss.  But we are also very sure, along with Prince, BY and YS involvements and if the three witty hotties brainmesh, forming a team esp with YS’ piece of information on the newborn Kim ‘prince, is the bona fide only competent tete a tete against KimHan we are patiently waiting for the satisfaction of it being diligently unfolding as writer has always been most capable of.

Love is,  that is all it takes.  She is unforgivable, as the rebel’s daughter, leaving him…and to keep her from harm’s way, he has consciously made a decision to dash all his hope and dreams and faith… yet his fingers hold her tighter, even if just the loose fabric on her thinner shoulder, her fingers giving in but her rational only allows her to hold onto his robe: she loves him, but they can never be.   He knows, the slightest saddest smile of relief on his face, at least she loves him so.

I do not care if I am weird and forever alone.  I am totally fine with the endgame of no conventional happy ending of Prince and RO together together.  This is love, beautiful love.  They have it, nothing is taking this away even if they are apart.  Like the moon it is.

Light is on, my eyes take in the scene:

The spacious room, the lonely bed.

Light is off, it’s all the same.

The wound in heart, nobody to share.

Life flows away with time,

grows old along hair turning white.

Leaving along with you, joy is nowhere to be found.

Fading away with the past,

passing out with dreams,

disappearing with a numbed heart.

I miss you so much, miss you so, but can not show a trace.

Tiptoeing around missing you,

Still letting the memories circling me,

Still shedding tears with closed eyes,

still pretend I not to care.

I miss you so much, miss you so…

I try lying to myself.

I miss you so much, miss you so…

but I am lying to myself.

I miss you so much, miss you so…

I’ll make it a secret.

I miss you so much, miss you so…

so I hide it deep in my heart.

5:  CrownPrince, RaOn, YoonSung, HaYeon and ByunYeon.

2:  Yeong and RaOn.

0:  Moon

5201314.

One thought on “Moonlight Drawn By Clouds 14

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